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I’m really not ready to begin this whole process over again—the doctor appointments, the medical history monologues, the tests, the worry…the unknown. I thought I was past this. I mean, that’s what the last surgery was for, right? It would fix my pain; I could have a ‘normal’ life. But I guess not…
If things were like they were a year ago—if my pain hadn’t changed, if I wan’t passing out and convulsing—I would just continue to suck it up. I had already accepted that this is my life and that my life just happens to come with pain. (After 7 years one would hope I eventually came to terms with it.) But that’s not an option anymore.
So, here we go again. I pray for answers this time.